Motivation: The Power of Asking

Home
>
Motivation
>
Motivation: The Power of Asking

Motivation: The Power of Asking

Very shortly, in this paragraph, I'm going to share with you how to get just about anything you want. I usually try to keep things very simple and useable.

However, this is a very complex and sophisticated psychological principle, so I want you to be well prepared for what I'm about to say.

Take a deep breath. Are you ready?

OK. Here's the basic principle for how to get just about anything you want in life -

ASK!

"Oh man, c'mon! It can't be that easy, can it?"

Oh yes it can!

You just have to know how to ask.

Here's a suggestion. Go get the book, "The Aladdin Factor", by Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen, the authors of the "Chicken Soup for the Soul" series. It's a great little how to book, all about the power and strength of asking.

To be able to access the power and strength of asking, we need to be able to do at least two things;

1) Eliminate any barriers to asking, and

2) Learn how to ask.

Barriers to Asking

Knowledge of asking - The Eagles once sang, "So many times it happens, that we live our lives in chains, and we never even know we have the key." The first barrier to eliminate is simply ignorance about asking. This is one of those times where knowledge is power.

Permission to ask - Too many times we have this belief that it shows weakness to ask questions or to ask for something we want. For some reason, men seem to be genetically programmed to not be able to ask for help. Especially if it has to do with asking for directions. Here's a quick joke - "Why does it take a million sperm cells to fertilize one egg? Because the stubborn little guys won't stop and ask for directions!"

How to Ask

Ask for what you want, not for what you don't want - Now that sounds awfully obvious, but stop and think about it for a minute. If you are asking your spouse to stop yelling at you, your focus (and their's) is still on yelling. Asking to be spoken to in a more respectful, caring manner is not only asking for what you want, it's offering a few suggestions as well.

Ask clearly - In order to ask clearly, you have to first be clear on what you want. One way to do this is to get a clear picture in your mind of what you want. A fun and easy way to do this is to create a movie in your imagination of exactly what it is you want. Add as much detail as you can. Asking clearly allows you to.......

Ask specifically - If what you want is more money, it's fairly easy to get a clear picture of more money. But how much? I can hand you a dollar bill and you've got more money than before. I don't believe that's what you meant by more money, however.

Ask the right person - In a recent seminar on the BRAAVO Approach, a woman asked me an excellent question - "If I know what I want, but don't know what actions to take, what do I do?"

Great question.

The good news is you don't have to re-invent the wheel. Find someone who is doing or has done what you want to do, and then ask them a few questions, such as -

How do I get from where I am to where you are? What are three things I must do? What I three things must I avoid?

So here are some questions for your consideration -

If you could ask for anything you wanted, what would it be? Think in terms of relationships, career, financial, etc. What's stops you from asking for what you want? Who do you know that asks well? What could you learn from them? What have you not asked for in the past that you now regret? How might your life be different if you had asked?

Here's one more suggestion, and then I'll wrap this up. Knowing what you now know, what would you like to ask for in your life? Take a moment to reflect and get specific about what you might want. Now, ask for something even bigger and greater than that.

Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.

In The News:

MSU News
Need workout motivation? Try a virtual partner
msnbc.com
Don't sweat it — new research shows that even a virtual exercise partner might boost your motivation to exercise. Researchers found that women who biked alone experienced a decline in motivation over time, whereas those partnered with a virtual friend ...
With virtual pal, women double workoutsFuturity: Research News
Cyber partners help you go the distanceScienceBlog.com (blog)
Cyber exercise partners help you go the distanceMSU News

all 5 news articles »

Comcast SportsNet Philadelphia
Eagles' Jarrett 'motivated by pride' in year two
Comcast SportsNet Philadelphia
He knows the doubts remain, but he is using it as motivation. “I'm motivated by pride,” Jarrett said. “I've got a chip on my shoulder every day to be the best.” Jarrett never had it easy. He grew up in the Bedford-Stuyvesant section of New York with a ...

and more »

Soccer365 (press release)
City taunts motivate Cleverley
Soccer365 (press release)
Cleverley told the Daily Star: "The motivation is there, massively. It's our neighbours, our rivals. Nothing needs to be said to motivate ourselves. "Football seems to be the only talking point in Manchester at the minute. "When your neighbours are ...

and more »

How to Motivate Someone
Huffington Post
To motivate another person, you have to appeal to their values. This may seem straightforward, but it isn't. Too often we try to motivate others by indoctrinating them in our values rather than by appealing to theirs. A classic example of this is the ...

Gary Allen's marathon motivation marked by decades of endurance
Bangor Daily News
Gary Allen trains along Sargent Drive in Northeast Harbor as part of his preparation for the Boston Marathon in 2010. Allen's recent finish of 2 hours, 59 minutes and 48 seconds in the Tacoma City Marathon marked the 65th time he has completed a ...

My View: Can tests motivate students? It depends on the test - and the student
CNN (blog)
They co-authored the report, “Student Motivation—An Overlooked Piece of School Reform." (CNN) – We're taking many steps as a nation to boost student achievement. We're raising academic standards, revising curricula, revamping low-performing schools ...

Sydney Morning Herald
Ian Thomsen: Boston Celtics look for motivation to lock in Game 6 win over 76ers
SI.com
By encouraging Sixers fans to attack him and his team, he was admitting that he needs the motivation. It will surely be offered as soon as he is introduced before Game 6. It will be up to Garnett and Rajon Rondo to drive their tired, injured team ...
Collins' words more motivation than barbThe News Journal
Collins goes to the archives for Game 6 motivationThe Mercury
Paul Pierce on Game 7: 'I like our chances'WEEI.com
FOXSports.com -SportingNews.com -Bleacher Report
all 2,816 news articles »

Channel 7 Daily News
Motivation For Youths
Channel 7 Daily News
They were there to hear a high-powered panel of professional motivational speakers from Mexico, United States, Cuba and Columbia. The idea was to educate the youths of Belize about the benefits of living a positive lifestyle and inspire them to do the ...

and more »

McKinney High Uses Difficult 2011 Football Season As Motivation Entering New ...
TownSquareBuzz.com
While it could be perceived as rock bottom for a very proud Texas high school football program, last season serves as a constant source of motivation for the 2012 Lions, who wrapped up the spring football season with the Blue vs.

and more »

Shape Magazine (blog)
Stay Motivated to Workout this Weekend
Shape Magazine (blog)
But if you don't want chasing said ice cream man to be the most exercise you get all weekend let your man (or your new summer fling) be your motivation! To keep things light and fun for the holiday here are a few quirky facts we gathered from our ...

Google News